THE LAS VEGAS "CHEW"

     Last summer, my fraternity brothers and I got together at my retreat fifteen miles outside of Las Vegas for a week of some good old fun like we used to have when we were in college...a week of some good old-fashioned leg admiration---and "chewing".

     The days during the summer promised to be nice, sunny and HOT! We all chose lots and decided that we would spend the days indoors in the nice air-conditioning and the nights outside under the clear skies and stars. But, one thing was certain...we would definitely lie face down at attention with our mouths over the backs of one another's knees!!!

     The living room of my Vegas home was more than large enough for all of us...eleven in all...to make a huge circle, with me at the beginning and the last one having his mouth over the back of my knees. We figured to get in at least six to eight hours of honest-to-goodness "chewing" each day...and four to six hours each night...before we went home at the end of the week. Our daytime indoor clothing would consist of our knee-length denim shorts, white knee socks and sneakers. Our nighttime clothing would consist of our soccer shorts, jersey, knee socks and shoes. Also...the lineup would change. I would never bite the same knees twice...nor would the same guy bite mine twice. There would be enough to go around!

     I fell face down on the floor with my arms at my sides. Then, each consecutive frat brother did likewise, until the last one lay face down before me, the back of his knees under my waiting mouth and pearly white teeth.

     I had set a clock on a nearby table which would ring four times...the first and third rings to start the chewing and the second and fourth to stop. The rules were simple: at the first ring, we were to place our mouths on the back of the left knee, suck it in and clamp it hard between our teeth. We were then to commence chewing and licking the sweet skin, sucking on it so as to create a dark red "hickey" which would be visible to any who saw it. When the alarm rang, we were to release the knee, rest our mouths on the right knee and wait for the alarm to ring, signalling the start of sucking, chewing and licking the skin until the alarm rang again. This was how we proceeded with our fun each day and night.

     Plus, we had an added bonus. Each of our names were written on eleven sheets of paper and placed into a fishbowl. The bowl was then passed between us and each of us picked a piece of paper with a secret name on it. Each ballot was then given to the fraternity leader. Whoever's name was chosen the most was then staked out face down at night in the desert about a hundred yards from my house and left there until the sun rose the following morning. This was how we ended each night's ritual.

     I was the lucky one whose name was chosen three times. That meant three nights I was staked out, face down, in my soccer uniform with only my knees exposed to the chilly night desert air. Let me tell you how this experience felt. In a single word...FABULOUS!!! I mean the chilly night air tasting the skin of my knees was fantastic. I was honored to have been chosen the most. I was lucky as well...lucky that there were no coyotes who dared to venture out in the Las Vegas desert night to snack on such a tender morsel.

     At week's end, we each said our goodbyes and either drove or flew to our respective homes, where we would stay until our next meeting in mid-winter...at my house in New Paltz, New York!